dysphagia

I am really beginning to like this distraction-free writing page. Not that anyone sees this part of wordpress.

The question has been asked at least 10 times today. “How did it go?” and it’s not that I’ve grown tired of answering it. It’s probably more that my answer doesn’t change very much and can’t. I have to be very careful of what I write here because I signed a confidentiality agreement =P I think when it comes down to it, it is what it is. The MMI stations were touch and go for some which was expected but I think I just had a lot of fun in the panel. As much as I had thought of some answers to some questions, it felt so very natural. And maybe I laughed a little bit too much but I like to think that somewhere in the subjective criteria they’d like to take people who comfortable and if not, that’s perfectly okay too. I got to talk about ballet, my novel and I think I had the opportunity to be light in a more explicit way. Not sure if I was able to come up with words that gave justice to what Christ has been in my life but again, it is what it is.

The rest of the day was interesting. I felt super intimidated first going into the lobby because as much as I think I look decent in a suit and tie, everyone else seemed to look a billion times more legit. I mean I am 20 and apparently the average entrance age is 24? (you learn something new everyday). There were decent amounts of time that I sat by myself on a couch singing musical lyrics from Rent because that’s all I could think of. Actually, the past 2-3 weeks I’ve been singing Finale B. Maybe it’s the way it starts. There is no future, there is no past, thank God this moment’s not the last. I don’t know how much truth is actually in those lyrics but there might be that subconscious hope that the future isn’t creeping on me so prevalently. Anyway, I got a lot more comfortable closer to the interview after meeting someone familiar and being able to talk to them. And post-interview it was nice to hear that some of the current first years also had touch and go feelings about MMI and thought the panel was fun. Not sure how I would actually feel if I got into Queen’s but…we’ll get there when we get there. Kind of excited for tomorrow, seeing a bunch of MCBC faces. =)

Unfortunately I’ll probably in some capacity enter into the over-thinking stage. Or maybe I won’t because there’s just so much to do. I almost feel like I should apologize to committee and just about every other group because I’ve been so out of it for the past week and still very much disconnected, as a continuation from going to South Carolina. There’s a lot lined up for this week but I think it’ll also be a week where my actual heart can rest and stop. The Lord’s voice for that has been getting stronger. This weekend was good. Letting go of just about everything and apart from the two hours of concentrated intensity, it’s been nice just to meet with people (some random) and hear from them. Even got to hear about KCCF tonight. And then I get to go back and have a nice DGL discussion about Q&A. =) Praise the Lord.